Sunday, 12 September 2010

Treatment - Sunday Scribblings # 232

Written for Sunday Scribblings prompt 232 - Treatment - this is part three of an ongoing story...
Part two
- prompt - Wait - Read it here
Part one
- prompt - Faith - Read that here

T R E A T M E N T

He had once sat her down in the corner of laroks bar, twisting his glass on the sticky table as he tried to explain that jumble of feelings she engendered in him.

He told her of the longing each time she left the smoky bar and walked out into the sparkling night without him. He reminded her that he was only half a person when she was not there, of how much he wanted to possess her to make her his and for her to stop her wandering and stay with him.

He talked of the dreams he had about her...

She sat very still for once, static except for the lights from the games machines that flickered across her porcelain skin and she listened intently to his words. She let him finish before turning her chair toward him and whispering in that throaty voice of hers.

Look honey, that is your play, your game and there aint no treatment for that...you got the medicine. I'm just the screen you are throwing these projections onto, you don't want me, you want what I represent. Find it inside yourself honey...

She got to her feet like a ballet dancer and kissed him gentle on his cheek and before he could say another word she was gone, out into the sparkling night alone.
.

13 comments:

jaerose said...

How beautiful! The characters shone and the story was perfectly captured..very much enjoyed..jae :)

Deborah said...

Brilliantly written, I wish I could keep reading ... can't wait for the next instalment!

Understanding Alice said...

ha, she did well to speak and leave :)

Lisa said...

this was really a great piece. great and gutsy move on her part to walk away, and call his bluff.

Elizabeth said...

What wise words she speaks. Really like this one.

Elizabeth

Dasuntoucha said...

Sweet...now I'm off to read pts. I & II...

Leo said...

very nice narration :) this is like a Sunday Scribble Series :D

My Sunday Scribbling

Dee Martin said...

wonderful descriptions here - I'm going to have to go back and read the other parts!

gautami tripathy said...

Great narration and detailed..

a child's play

And do get aboard the Poetry Train every Monday mornings and thereafter!

Maya said...

arrrgghhhh! projections, projections, projections ! :) :) :)

Flying Monkey said...

The things we project onto other people...So much truth. Love HER...strong character....

Medhini said...

Wow... that was wonderfully said! Such profound meaning said in simple words!

Susannah said...

Thanks everyone, I really appreciate you taking the time to read and leave comments.

I wonder whether I will be inspired to continue the story with this weeks prompt...we'll see. :-)

Thanks again.

Susannah x

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