Sunday, 12 June 2011

Sitting - Watching - Sitting

This is my second week joining in with The Sunday Whirl Wordle.

(Image by Susannah Bec)

S I T T I N G - W A T C H I N G - S I T T I N G

Lotus position
held their torsos
kinship found
in this space

No need for stories
strange, alluring
on her face
Monkey mind
devious chatter
stillness makes
the body sleep

Bold assumptions
now retreating
wish fulfillment
cutting deep
Inner worlds
no less enchanting
a sense of peace
residing there

This vast silence
so inspiring
Sunlight glinting
on her hair. . .

The word lotus immediately took me to the lotus position and meditation. I had a vision of someone watching a group of people in a meditation class, perhaps a man waiting for his girlfriend - hence - Sitting - Watching - Sitting. The sitting part of the title and the words in black are about the meditators/meditation and the parts in purple (watching) are the voice of the man waiting, the one watching. I hope that explanation doesn't sound too confusing!

The words this week are - Alluring, Stories, Strange, Bold, Lotus, Sleep, Wish, Kinship, Devious, Torsos, Enchanting, Inspiring. - I used them all, I have only just realised that I didn't HAVE to! That will make life easier next time. :-)

Above Image - copyright Susannah Bec 2008


brenda w said...

This is beautiful, Susannah. Meditiation is an art, and you certainly got the "devious chatter" right, at least in my experience. Lovely piece. I'm glad you are back for a second week. ~brenda

Susannah said...

Thank you Brenda. :-)

Mary said...

I love this, Susannah. I picture yoga, get a feeling of deep inner peace from your poem!

flaubert said...

Nice rhyme and rhythm to this, Susannah.


Marianne said...

Impressive piece! Soothing and serene!

irene said...

I like how you arrange this like stepping stones.

Anonymous said...

I kept thinking yoga when I read the wordle words, but it just didn't want to go that way when I started writing! Nice job...and, welcome back! I'll warn ya...wordles are addictive! ;)

Here's mine: Inspiring Dreams.


Laurie Kolp said...

Beautiful, Susannah... love the image of sunlight in golden hair.

Traci B said...

Well written and structured, Susannah. You can read the whole thing as a single poem or the black verses as one poem and the other verse (your post calls them pink, but they're purple on my computer) as a separate poem. I like that. I also enjoyed the rhythm and flow of the lines.

Susannah said...

Thanks everyone for your kind words, they are much appreciated.

And Traci thanks very much for alerting me to the pink, purple issue! I have fixed it now, it should all be purple. :-)

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed this - a proper poem, with form and style, instead of my amorphous struggles with the wordle words!

barbara said...

Nicely done. The watcher may be on the side, but the rhyme ties him close.
I like the challenge of using all the words, but that can sometimes make a short poem clunky. Yours is all grace.

Susannah said...

Viv and Barbara, thank you both. :-)

Elizabeth said...

I didn't read it as two separate individuals, but rather the distinctly different sides of one person. That one doing the meditation, the other standing alongside speaking in that monkey mind. Like this a lot and have used this form to find resolution. It works well,


Susannah said...

Elizabeth, I just read back with your comment in mind and yes, it works really well that way too. Thanks for your comment. :-)

Mike Patrick said...

A lovely use of the prompt. I enjoy your process notes and wish everyone used them. To know the poet's vision isn't necessary to enjoy a poem, but it supplements the pleasure.

Susannah said...

Thanks Mike, it is something I have only recently started doing and actually went back and added them to this piece as I felt it helped in the understanding. :-)

Jinksy said...

Your two sets of words dance together well, a real partnership.:)

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