This is my second week joining in with The Sunday Whirl Wordle.
(Image by Susannah Bec)S I T T I N G - W A T C H I N G - S I T T I N G
Lotus position
held their torsos
kinship found
in this space
held their torsos
kinship found
in this space
No need for stories
strange, alluring
contemplation
on her face
strange, alluring
contemplation
on her face
Monkey mind
devious chatter
stillness makes
the body sleep
Bold assumptionsdevious chatter
stillness makes
the body sleep
now retreating
wish fulfillment
cutting deep
Inner worlds
no less enchanting
a sense of peace
residing there
no less enchanting
a sense of peace
residing there
This vast silence
so inspiring
Sunlight glinting
on her hair. . .
so inspiring
Sunlight glinting
on her hair. . .
The word lotus immediately took me to the lotus position and meditation. I had a vision of someone watching a group of people in a meditation class, perhaps a man waiting for his girlfriend - hence - Sitting - Watching - Sitting. The sitting part of the title and the words in black are about the meditators/meditation and the parts in purple (watching) are the voice of the man waiting, the one watching. I hope that explanation doesn't sound too confusing!
The words this week are - Alluring, Stories, Strange, Bold, Lotus, Sleep, Wish, Kinship, Devious, Torsos, Enchanting, Inspiring. - I used them all, I have only just realised that I didn't HAVE to! That will make life easier next time. :-)
Above Image - copyright Susannah Bec 2008
Above Image - copyright Susannah Bec 2008
18 comments:
This is beautiful, Susannah. Meditiation is an art, and you certainly got the "devious chatter" right, at least in my experience. Lovely piece. I'm glad you are back for a second week. ~brenda
Thank you Brenda. :-)
I love this, Susannah. I picture yoga, get a feeling of deep inner peace from your poem!
Nice rhyme and rhythm to this, Susannah.
Pamela
Impressive piece! Soothing and serene!
I like how you arrange this like stepping stones.
I kept thinking yoga when I read the wordle words, but it just didn't want to go that way when I started writing! Nice job...and, welcome back! I'll warn ya...wordles are addictive! ;)
Here's mine: Inspiring Dreams.
~Paula
Beautiful, Susannah... love the image of sunlight in golden hair.
Well written and structured, Susannah. You can read the whole thing as a single poem or the black verses as one poem and the other verse (your post calls them pink, but they're purple on my computer) as a separate poem. I like that. I also enjoyed the rhythm and flow of the lines.
Thanks everyone for your kind words, they are much appreciated.
And Traci thanks very much for alerting me to the pink, purple issue! I have fixed it now, it should all be purple. :-)
I enjoyed this - a proper poem, with form and style, instead of my amorphous struggles with the wordle words!
Nicely done. The watcher may be on the side, but the rhyme ties him close.
I like the challenge of using all the words, but that can sometimes make a short poem clunky. Yours is all grace.
Viv and Barbara, thank you both. :-)
I didn't read it as two separate individuals, but rather the distinctly different sides of one person. That one doing the meditation, the other standing alongside speaking in that monkey mind. Like this a lot and have used this form to find resolution. It works well,
Elizabeth
Elizabeth, I just read back with your comment in mind and yes, it works really well that way too. Thanks for your comment. :-)
A lovely use of the prompt. I enjoy your process notes and wish everyone used them. To know the poet's vision isn't necessary to enjoy a poem, but it supplements the pleasure.
Thanks Mike, it is something I have only recently started doing and actually went back and added them to this piece as I felt it helped in the understanding. :-)
Your two sets of words dance together well, a real partnership.:)
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