Sunday 4 September 2011

Up At Dawn . . .

Green leaves studded with dew,
quivering blooms, pallid in
the early morning light.

I watch the striped caterpillar crawl,
tentative, alert to birdlike movements,
arched and insistant, a moving jewel.

The roof rack is piled unfeasibly high,
with suitcases bound, bright coloured
ribbons, streamers tied tight to the bar.

We are both awaiting the hordes,
the gaggle of women, the slow stride
of men, and the goof of children.

Who will wave hankerchiefs, throw confetti,
hold flowers and song sheets, and watch
as this special day unfolds without a hitch.


Written for wordle 20 at The Sunday Whirl using all the words.

Not easy ones this week! Particularly goof and birdlike!
But as always I enjoyed letting the wordle lead me and seeing where I ended up. . . and I ended up with this tale. :-)

17 comments:

irene said...

You've developed the piece very nicely, evoking the mood and nervousness of a happy occasion.

Daydreamertoo said...

Awww a lovely wedding. I didn't know they threw song sheets too.
You wordled wonderfully. :)

brenda w said...

When I read the word bar it echoed, so I searched for its rhyme and found arched...I love those sound echoes, whether intentional or serendipitous. There is a gentle trepidation in the piece that ends with the surety of the final line.

My favorite image is the roof rack packed...."unfeasibly high"

Well wordled, Susannah.

annell4 said...

I loved what you did with the wordle.

Laurie Kolp said...

Susannah~ You've painted a clear picture in my mind of a fun, festive day with your clever use of the wordle words.

Anonymous said...

You took these words in a direction that I wouldn't have imagined! Thanks - I enjoyed the images you painted. Great use of the words.

Nanka said...

The day unfolded wonderfully, from sunrise, the wait with much anticipation and nervousness to see it through without a hitch!! Beautiful story :))

flaubert said...

Susannah, A very nice tale you've created here. Happy conclusion.

Pamela

Mike Patrick said...

You came up with a proper poem, and a darn good one.

Mary said...

I love all of the details you included in this poem about the beginning of a beautiful day!

Traci B said...

Wonderful poem, very evocative and festive. I also liked the roof rack piled unfeasibly high. :)

Anonymous said...

What a wonderful poem.
Why couldn't these wordle words evoke in me such pleasant thoughts, instead of the ones I eventually came up with?

Kerry O'Connor said...

You have captured the excitement of the occasion here. Great word usage. I loved the little details, like the caterpillar.

barbara said...

Wonderful.
Big events are made of such detail.

Susannah said...

Thanks everyone I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment. :-)

As always I really enjoyed the wordle but goof was a tricky one!

Good to see you all. x

Elizabeth said...

You may have thought it was tricky but you handled it well and it moved smoothly in the image you created. Well done!

Elizabeth

Cathy said...

Love the feel of it. Sounds like a wedding but it could be something too. Maybe somebody going on a wild cruise?

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