There were times,
when the days just slipped by.
Oozing into one another.
Ill defined chunks of time
liquidised, homogenised,
missed.
Until the moment,
you appeared in the middle
of that long black road, (the one
that led to all my tomorrows)
you barred my way, forcing me
to stop.
Derailed.
Suddenly conscious, of all that
before was just background soup.
Awake, aware, swallowed by feelings.
One message that changed
everything.
Written for Poets United Midnight Snack 003
Inspired by the picture prompt above - "copyright Adam Andersson"
"Textmessing Girl" by Reggaemanyo at Deviant Art
10 comments:
Good job. I like the
"Ill defined chunks of time
liquidised, homogenised,
missed."
and the last line which seems to cause a sudden stillness which ties to the pic very well.
Susannah,
"Ill defined chunks of time
liquidised, homogenised,"
"you appeared in the middle
of that long black road,"
"background soup"
Wow, Girl, This poem carries much weight, and your concrete images make it pop from the page. Great!
Namaste..........cj
One of my favorites for this photo prompt, Susannah. As I have come to expect, you came at the assignment from a completely unique angle and allowed me to see a different perspective. I like the going backward feeling to get to the link to the photo.
I wonder what that message was. Interesting.
I like this a lot...it begins with monotony's milk to the pivotal moment of awareness..Kudos!!
One never knows, I think, when one will receive that message that will change everything. We can just hope...and wait...
beautiful words. express the shock of a text message. the final verse goes in line with the image.
"Suddenly conscious, of all that
before was just background soup."
lovely lines
Susannah - love how you skillfully
led to the heart of your poem,
like waiting for that someone who
helps the waiting make sense.
This poem's story is similar to the
poem I have posted.
WE ALL BEHAVE LIKE MECHANICAL LOCOMOTIVES UNTIL THE ONE WHO DESTINED TO CHANGE US ARRIVES...
TRUTH ABOUT ALL LIFES.
LIKED IT... :)
Thanks very much for your comments everyone. :-)
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