between your action
and my reaction
I saw it happen
That hint of trouble
began to surface
instigating the game
we swore we wouldn't play
This year has been one
of calm surfaces and blue sky
one in which I could believe
that luck was on our side
That you were no longer
a citizen of that dream land
a denizen of those altered states
convinced that you could fly
Feet firmly planted in the black earth
something in your eyes gave it away
and in an instant the blue sky changed
becoming purple and black like a bruise
Written for The Sunday Whirlusing all of the words.
This story just arose out of the words as if by some strange alchemy. The wordle seems to instigate that happening! - pulling tales out of nowhere and pouring them onto the page.
This is not autobiographical.
9 comments:
I'm glad it isn't autobiographical, Susannah, and that the bruise was figurative and not literal. Great poem; it had me reading it in one breathless rush. :)
The ending of this wordle was stunning...the sky becoming black and blue like a bruise. Such vivid imagery! (From words that weren't all that easy)
Things certainly can change in an instant, can't they?
http://lkharris-kolp.blogspot.com/2011/12/trouble-at-bucks-billiards.html
Susannah, This is a strong piece of writing. You've captured something here, that unspoken moment that can change everything. Excellent write!
Vivid piece, Susannah. Yes, things can change in an instant.
Pamela
Happy holidays!
the end is so beautiful
I very much liked this. The destruction of hopes/loves/dreams are indeed bruising, turning one's blue skies black.
You did well churning the alchemic brew "like a bruise". :)
Susannah, right back atcha about not seeing the words jump out. And thank God it's not autobiographical. But I think if it were, you would have told us as well, because you strike me as courageous. The lines about the sky turning black and blue? A sky that is a spreading bruise... man, that really is powerful. Peace, Amy
http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2011/12/21/the-door-to-deceitful-delights-dverse/
Thanks very much everyone for popping in and reading, and taking the time to leave a comment. It is much appreciated.
It's good to see you all. x
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