Thursday, 20 October 2011

Not Broken. . .

I am not broken - I am dancing

Forgive my feet
while I learn the steps

(I'll stick to the shallows
until I can face the ocean)

I am not broken - I am dancing

Sunlight across my shoulder
a mantle I'll gladly wear

(forgive my false causes
as I drop all my woes)

I am not broken - I am dancing

I will draw back the bolt
that kept my door locked

(and applaud as hoops topple
I'll jump through them no more)

I am not broken - I am dancing


Written for The Sunday Whirl
I wrote this on Sunday but wasn't pleased with it and thought maybe I would try again later in the week, or even give the wordle a miss this week! The words really didn't flow for me this week. But I have decided to post it anyway as I really don't like to miss the Sunday Whirl. :-)

7 comments:

Mary said...

I love the repetion of "I am not broken = I am dancing. It heigtens the effectand drives the point home. Well wordled!

Susannah said...

Thanks Mary. :-) I found this weeks difficult, just could get a flow. Never mind, some weeks it pours onto the page some week it dribbles and smears! LOL

Good to see you. x

brenda w said...

The parenthetical lines are cleverly placed before each repetition. I love this piece. It's sparse, but leaves room for the reader to imagine what's happening as someone/something new emerges. It feels almost like a butterfly emerging from a cocoon tomb. I'm glad you posted!

Susannah said...

Thanks Brenda. :-) I almost missed this weeks. Good to see you. x

Morning said...

smart writing.

Morning said...

smart writing.

Promising Poets Parking Lot said...

http://promisingpoetsparkinglot.blogspot.com/2011/10/agreement-for-thursday-poets-rally-week_19.html

make a contribution to us today,
any poem is welcome.

keep it up.

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