tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2866329577695235177.post1013039090214288335..comments2023-09-04T09:31:46.467+01:00Comments on Panopticulated - writing when prompted to do so.: SUNKSusannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09581993763700327953noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2866329577695235177.post-62483355316854443702011-08-22T00:01:24.083+01:002011-08-22T00:01:24.083+01:00'sunk by the weight of the ocean'
This pi...'sunk by the weight of the ocean'<br /><br />This piece has a really ancient, gritty feel to it. I like it!Abigail Buntinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14993797228034911245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2866329577695235177.post-37379306368561744962011-08-21T23:31:16.743+01:002011-08-21T23:31:16.743+01:00Writing as the shipwreck itself was a unique take ...Writing as the shipwreck itself was a unique take that made it very interesting. Great job!Scribblerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09693402306029886703noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2866329577695235177.post-17173785285889538282011-08-21T16:01:00.197+01:002011-08-21T16:01:00.197+01:00Nice one Susannah!! My shipwreck is more like Jack...Nice one Susannah!! My shipwreck is more like Jack Sparrow's 'Pearl' , wrecked like flotsam and jetsam and then back to sea afresh!! :DNankahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05428694673909046094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2866329577695235177.post-91147925671349787512011-08-21T12:31:04.707+01:002011-08-21T12:31:04.707+01:00A lot like livingA lot like livingKodjo Deynoohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01299996598769756878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2866329577695235177.post-22538014747687505782011-08-21T08:44:40.412+01:002011-08-21T08:44:40.412+01:00Thanks very much for that Lilu.
As soon as I read...Thanks very much for that Lilu.<br /><br />As soon as I read your advice I was all "yes of course!" :-) and I did as you said and it read so much better. Then fueled by enthusiasm I continued to work on it and it has doubled in size. :-) <br /><br />Hopefully it now feels a little more complete.<br /><br />Thanks again, it is good to meet you. :-)Susannahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09581993763700327953noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2866329577695235177.post-46349935411104650272011-08-21T08:14:15.348+01:002011-08-21T08:14:15.348+01:00I think this has a lovely base for a poem =) Howev...I think this has a lovely base for a poem =) However, I felt as though the last stanza should've been in the middle to even out the rhythm. It seems to stop all out of nowhere. And it leaves the reader a bit confused.<br /><br />Visiting you from Sunday Scribblings ^___^Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06325724692596441614noreply@blogger.com